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Territories

FRANCHISE OPPORTUNITIES
COSTS

Franchise Buy-In
Each 4.5-mile franchise territory can be purchased for the jaw-dropping low price of $4500. This is a one-time purchase. After you buy it, it is yours until you sell it or forfeit your rights to it by breach of contract.

When you consider that you can make your buy-in money back in a single day of operation, you know that purchasing your section of the line-in-the-sand was a wise choice.

Franchise Fees
Again, you'll be amazed at how little this will cost you. Our centralized services (marketing, software, accounting, etc.) will save you time and money. We can provide this to you for only 4.5% of your gross income, because we spread the cost of providing these services. You'll be pulling in so much cash (dollars and pesos) that you will not even miss the little you pass along to us.

Users of your service will use our exclusive Wallicopter ride-hailing app to request your services. Payment is processed by us. For your convenience, all franchise fees are deducted directly from this amount, and the remainder (95.5%) of the payment is electronically transferred to you in the off-shore account we will set up for you.

Equipment
All franchisees are required to purchase one of our custom-manufactured Wallicopter quadcopters. Currently we offer one model that is capable of shuttling a 200-pound payload up to 20 miles from the controller (you are always in control of the unit). The Wallicopter model 200-20 is sold to franchisees only, and for the low, low price of $45,000. At that incredibly low price, this unit can pay for itself in less than a month of operation.

Currency
All franchise fees and equipment purchases must be paid for in precious metals. We understand the basic flaws of a fiat-currency system, so your silly little pictures of dead presidents are no good with us. And please don't make us laugh you out of the room by trying to pass off some even-more-valueless form of “currency” like bitcoin or other digital/crypto currency.

Some territories are more desirable than others, so reserve yours now.

Keep scrolling. There is more vital information below the image.


Actual Photoshopped Image

Equipment

Quadcopter
Our Wallicopters are quadcopters manufactured to our specifications by the people with the greatest wall and the cheapest electronics. We've partnered with a Chinese company to bring to you the Wallicopter Model 200-20. It easily carries a payload of 200 pounds up to 20 miles from the controller (you operate the controller).

The Wallicopter 200-20 comes fully equipped with everything you need to shuttle people, avocados, “pharmaceuticals” (wink, wink), etc.

Automated in-flight beverage services make certain your human cargo is never lacking in comfort.

High-definition cameras placed all around the vehicle assure you of our patent-pending Sphereview. There are no blind spots in your camera views. You can easily detect trees, planes, border patrol, fences, etc., and maneuver to avoid them.

As a free bonus service, all Wallicopter 200-20s are equipped with automatic sharing of border agent locations. Using the Wallicopter app on your phone, tablet, or laptop, you get real-time monitoring of the positions of humans and vehicles within five miles of the border.

As a double-extra bonus feature, Wallicopter 200-20s jam the signals being sent from border-patrol cameras. The real images are replaced with charming stills and video from my vacations, like this one from Aruba.

Phone, Tablet, or Laptop
You will need a smartphone, tablet, or laptop in order to get ride-hailing notifications. We operate much like any other ride-hailing service. The only difference is that our ride-hailing covers both people and cargo.

If you are wondering why there is no link to reserve your territory, check our FAQ. page for "Is this real".

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